Mind Your Manners
Shut Up was sitting on the gates of Be Quiet's house, throwing words at his door. G-E-T Y-O-U hit with a thud and slid down the door. L-O-S-E-R splatted on the windowpane. C-U-N fell short on the path.
Be Quiet watched this all from the comfort of his living room, perplexed. He did not know Shut Up, could not imagine what he had done to make someone throw C-U-N at him. Although he was a little frightened, he decided to find out.
He opened the door to have W-A-N hit him in the face and K-E-R splash into the house. Shut Up laughed and laughed.
"Why did you do that?" Be Quiet called out.
This appeared to make Shut Up even angrier. F-U-C-K-I-N-G, C-U-N-T (no missing this time) and B-A-S-T-A-R-D all came hurtling towards Be Quiet with ferocious, furious speed. But he could predict Shut Up's plan of attack now and dodged them all easily.
Shut Up was so angry he couldn't find the words. He stood shaking his silent fist on the lawn, his red face glowing, his black eyes bulging. His thin lips flapped, trying to speak. He kicked a passing cat, hollered a wordless holler at the staring children and stomped home.
Be Quiet watched this all from the comfort of his living room, perplexed. He did not know Shut Up, could not imagine what he had done to make someone throw C-U-N at him. Although he was a little frightened, he decided to find out.
He opened the door to have W-A-N hit him in the face and K-E-R splash into the house. Shut Up laughed and laughed.
"Why did you do that?" Be Quiet called out.
This appeared to make Shut Up even angrier. F-U-C-K-I-N-G, C-U-N-T (no missing this time) and B-A-S-T-A-R-D all came hurtling towards Be Quiet with ferocious, furious speed. But he could predict Shut Up's plan of attack now and dodged them all easily.
Shut Up was so angry he couldn't find the words. He stood shaking his silent fist on the lawn, his red face glowing, his black eyes bulging. His thin lips flapped, trying to speak. He kicked a passing cat, hollered a wordless holler at the staring children and stomped home.
posted by shannon at 2:12 AM
5 Comments:
A great idea, this. And were it not for the foul-mouthed language, it would make for a fantastic children’s story. Then again, given the way kids talk today you could probably publish it as it is.
You know what I like best though? Your use of the words ‘hollered’ and ‘holler’.
I really enjoyed all of your pieces Shannon. I especially liked the C-U-N part in this piece - very clever stuff.
As Paul said, you could use this with kids - they'd love it. In fact, they'd probably ask to read it every lesson!
I'm so glad you're up here now. Keep up the great work.
Now, I'm going to read them all again...
I just came back to say some more. Have read the pieces a few times - thankyouxxx
This reminds me of my father. You write a lot about anger, very coyly. I like it. Of course, your voice comes through, just as it does in your letters.
we are pissed you are lovely signed us xxxxxxx
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